A SOOO L.A. GARAGE SALE

Where I grew up, in the Midwest, people would nail a "Garage Sale" sign to a telephone pole or a wooden stake in the grass. In L.A. people stick them on a shiny $100,000 car and call it a day.

Um...You're Not At The Beach

I'm in line at my neighborhood Ralph's (grocery store) right now, which is located about 2.5 miles from the beach - much farther than most people are willing to walk. The girl in line in front of me - probably in her mid-twenties - has on a bikini and flip-flops. No shorts. No towel. Just a bikini. In a grocery store. I would snap a picture, but that just seems dirty and weird. Is this normal? Does the fact that we are somewhat close to the beach make this attire NOT so bizarre?

SPOTTED

My girlfriend went hiking today in the ever popular hotspot, Runyon Canyon, and sent me this:

"Got a "HELLO" from a very in-shape/handsome man on my grundgy,sweaty,funktalicious hike this afternoon...... It was our very own L.A. MAYOR, ANTONIO VILLARAIGOSA. Dude is fine!!! I see now why these newscasters are lining up to him! Body is fit and handsome. He had on shorts and a tee shirt. Security trailing him."

HOTTIE MAYOR

- Check.

HOTTIE MAYOR WHO HIKES MOST INFAMOUS CELEB-FILLED HOLLYWOOD WORKOUT SPOT

- Check.

HOTTIE MAYOR GIVING A "HELLO" TO MY SEXY GIRLFRIEND WHO'S DRIPPING W/ SWEAT

- Check.

That's SOOO L.A.

A SOOO L.A. POTTY BREAK

A few days ago I was working as an extra on a new sitcom called, ACCIDENTALLY ON PURPOSE. The show stars Jenna Elfman and will air on CBS in the fall. After a few hours on set -(and many, MANY cups of free coffee) - nature called, and I made my way to the nearest restroom. To get to the bathroom, you had to exit the soundstage and walk outside to the next building over. I made my tinkle, and while washing my hands started to glance around the ladies room. It wasn't super dirty or anything, but I couldn't help thinking to myself, "It must be nice to be the star of the show. I'm sure she has her own private bathroom." JUST as I finished my thought (I swear!) out of the next stall walks Jenna Elfman!! Full makeup and glowing in her white bathrobe (thrown on over her wardrobe to keep warm and clean on set.) I think I somehow managed to contain the shocked look on my face when I saw her, but maybe not. It seemed as if God was playing a practical joke on me in that moment! I smiled and said hi as we both washed our hands, and then she hightailed it out of there while I was still laughing to myself about the irony of the situation! Too funny, and definitely SOOO L.A.!!!

STRAIGHT FROM CRAIGSLIST

Female Model Needed For Colon Hydrotherapy Demonstration (L.A/Vent.)

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Date: 2009-08-02, 4:25PM PDT
Reply to: gigs-5jyqy-1302423124@craigslist.org ^{[Errors when replying to ads?]}

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No experience needed!! An excellent opportunity for college students.
Now's your chance to not only take part in an educational and healthful experience, but to get PAID for doing it!
We are seeking a healthy female to assist a licensed colon hydrotherapist in a single session for training purposes.
Pay is $125/hr. (Estimated time 1.5-2 hours)

• Location: L.A/Vent.
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
• Compensation: 125

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? $125 to get your Colon Cleansed in front of people??!!

You'd have to pay me $125,000 to even consider it!!!!